Father Michael L. Pfleger prays for all fatherless children

Dr. O’Neill thanks God for saving 4-year-old daughter’s life

 

By Chinta Strausberg

 

Father Michael L. Pfleger prayed for all fatherless children on Father’s Day telling them they have the love and attention of many father’s including an entire family structure at Saint Sabina so they will never be alone.

 

To highlight Father’s Day 2012, Dr. Walter J.H. O’Neill, a member of Saint Sabina for the past 14-years, revealed how God kept him out of prison, ultimately led him to Saint Sabina where he met his wife and how God healed his 4-year-old daughter diagnosed with stage four cancer.

 

So as to leave no one behind on Father’s Day,  Pfleger asked for all fatherless children to stand in the middle aisle. He and the entire church prayed for the children and let them know they all have surrogate mothers and fathers, an entire family structure there at Saint Sabina.

 

When a family member of 17-year-old Ondelee Perteet pushed his wheelchair towards the center aisle, Pfleger hugged the teen and again reminded him that despite what doctors say one day he will walk. Perteet was shot at a party in September of 2009 at the age of 14. He was paralyzed. He is a member of Saint Sabina and often speaks out against gun violence.

 

Earlier, in introducing the guest speaker, O’Neill, who plays the Congo drums, Pfleger called him a “mighty man of faith” who is “bold in what he believes and is unashamed of it…and he is uncompromising for what he stands for” and a man he calls his “soul brother.” “He has been a gift to me,” said Pfleger thanking McNeill for sharing his musical gift with the church. Pfleger said McNeill no longer accepts pay for playing for the church. It is his way of giving back.

 

McNeil keynoted the 11:15 a.m. Saint Sabina Father’s Day worship services where he laid out his entire life including the good, bad, the ugly and the blessings he has received especially after he met and married his wife, Selisa O’Neill, in 1999 who bore him four beautiful children including twins.

 

O’Neill, who has a Ph.D. in educational leadership from and works at Roosevelt University, lifted up his family as the most important part of his life outside of God.

 

As he spoke, his wife, Mrs. O’Neill, a quiet and sedate woman, clung to the hands of their children blowing kisses at her husband who stood nervously at the podium giving praises to his family. Looking on with pride were his children, John Paul, 12, Jeremiah, 9, Jessica, 7, who once battled cancer and won and Jada, 7.“I’m simply a son who became a father who is learning how to become a better son,” O’Neil said repeatedly.

 

Mr. O’Neil said his daughter, Jessica, is currently cancer-free but is still being monitored. She was four-years old when she was first diagnosed with stage four cancer. “It was unbelievably insane…,” he said after learning about his daughter’s diagnoses.

 

He also reflected on those who have spoken at Saint Sabina including Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Rev. Al Sharpton, Rev. Joseph Lowery, Martin Luther King, III, Dexter King; Harry Belafonte, Dr. Cornel West, Mayor Harold Washington, Joseph Cardinal Joseph Bernadin, Rev. C.T. Vivian, Rev. Clay Evans and many others. O’Neil said he is standing on their shoulders.

 

“We all have men in our lives who provide us with the framework, a living example of what a father is and how a father should behave,” he said. “In addition to our forefathers of faith who stand as templates or role models of fatherhood, on this father’s day, I also think of the sons and father’s who have become victims of this senseless war that is destroying our country.”

 

Saying he is not referring to the Iraqi, Afghanistan or this countries lesser wars, O’Neil was referring to the gun violence that continues to take the lives of so many people including children almost on a daily basis.

 

“The war I’m referring to is the senseless war being fought on the streets right here in Chicago where the victims are so numerous and so often very conveniently forgotten because to remember or honor them cause us to be honest about our faults, about our shortcomings, about our isms, about our selfishness.

 

“I think today about the unsung heroes, the men who have stood strong…those men who had to bury their sons…men such as Trayvon Martin, father of slain Trayvon Martin, our own Ronald Holt, father of slain Blair Holt and literally thousands every year who have to stand strong in the midst of suffering great loss from this senseless…” violence.

 

O’Neill spoke of fatherless children and how studies suggest, “a child’s fate is almost sealed and doomed if she or she grows up without a father, without a dad. We’ve heard of data that suggests that almost 60 percent of the children born in the inner city today are born without a father or dad present in their lives. We agree that men need to step it up.

 

“But, I am tired of the marginalization and spiritual castration of good men, of the good fathers, the good husband, of the good sons lumping them into the same” category as the “absentee DNA donors who don’t stand up for their children. You would think that there are no good fathers in the world if you believe all the hype,” he said.

 

“This church is full of good men, good fathers, good husbands and good sons. Today, I speak for them. Today, I honor them. Today, we affirm them as the great men of God that they are…,” said O’Neill. And, that included Father Pfleger who recently buried his second son, Beronti.

 

McNeil focused on two parts of his life, “the age of BC” the time before Christ that had ruled his life. The second is WC, the time with Christ as the ruler of my life….” Raised in New York by Catholic and devoted parents, McNeil said while his childhood was filled with excellent opportunities, he chose to “squander” those blessings.

 

“I chose a life of godlessly wandering, social promotion in high school before the term was even coined. My classes consisted mostly of getting high, drunk and plotting my next crime spree. I graduated from family court to local jail time and only narrowly escaping prison, but courts and jails weren’t enough to straighten me up.”

 

O’Neil said while he was acting out, many urged his father to give up on him, to let him go. “He never did,” O’Neil said praising his father for appearing in court where he was going to be sentenced. At that time, is father told him, “Walter, you got to keep busy in there. Don’t give up. Read and read some more. I love you Walter. You are my son,” his father told him. “He knew God was in control.” In growing up, O’Neill said while love was in his household, it was never discussed.

 

 O’Neil was given a second chance by the judge and went on to college graduating in four-years. “I have been giving back ever since. For the past 28-years, I have been helping youth break the cycle of poverty through higher education. All by the grace of God and a praying power.”

 

O’Neil came to Chicago in 1991 and while thinking he had his act together but he said he was still not grounded and began to look for things “that pleased the old Walter.” He said his road to Damascus “was very real. It involved naked truth, honest talk, a lot of shouting and plenty of tears.”

 

Ultimately, he had an unexplainable peace. “I had an intimate time with Christ, and I was never, ever going to let anything else get in the way.”

 

He came to Saint Sabina in 1998 and sat in the last seat in the last row because while he loved the church he thought the Saint Sabinians “ were a little crazy.” He waned to be by the door so he could escape at a moment’s notice, but the more he came to Saint Sabina, the more spiritual he became.

 

 O’Neil began to move up in the rows and ultimately became an armor bearer. “Who would have ever thought after all of this time, after all of the wrong I had done that not only I would be forgiven but I would be eternally blessed? Who would have thought I would meet the woman who would join me on a life-long journey of exploring God’s grace and mercy? Isn’t God awesome?”

 

O’Neil said it took him two-months to get up the courage to ask Selisa out to lunch. Another two-months they were engaged and seven-months later they were married at Saint Sabina. “We made a commitment when we met that we would not do things that we had done in previous relationships. We agreed that we were not going to be with each other until after we were married. We were fully grown and we practiced abstinence,” he told a cheering congregation.

 

“Two-weeks after our honeymoon, we were pregnant with our first child,” said O’Neill. “Soon came our second child and then the twins.” Turning to his children, O’Neill said, “I love you with my last breath. I am so proud of each and every one of you, and Selisa, you are the reason for my existence. I love you more now today than I have every loved you. You are my queen. I am just so thankful that God has placed you in my life and that you are crazy enough to stay. I love you, baby,” he told his wife as she blew kisses at her husband.

 

But, life for this couple has not been picture perfect. In 2009, he was crushed at losing his father. Six-months later his daughter, Jessica, then 4, had stage four cancer. “How just is that” he had asked. He was angry and said; “The devil was not going to destroy my family and damn sure was not going to do that to my daughter.”

 

Within 48-hours, his daughter had to have emergency surgery to remove her kidney and begin an intensive regiment of radiation and chemo. “I put all of the doctors on notice, the nurses, parking attendants, volunteers, to get it right, do your thing, pay attention, no time for nonsense.” He and his family prayed in the waiting room. He had Father Pfleger on his speed dial. The surgery was a success. “We got through the bad stuff,” he said.

 

One day when he was in his daughter’s hospital room where his wife had been living after the surgery, O’Neill said his mother-in-law called and asked him to leave the room so she could talk to her daughter. His mother-in-law told him that his wife’s brother, Anthony, who had been with them a few days earlier in the waiting room of the hospital, was found dead in her garage.

 

“He was barely 50-years old…. I was speechless” and wondered how he would break this news to his wife. Anthony’s funeral was held the same weekend his daughter was released from the hospital. Saying it can be rough for dads, O’Neill said he is a son who is trying to become a better son.

 

The good news is that his daughter is much better so much so he forgave God but less than three-weeks later, his daughter had to be rushed to the hospital for yet another surgery. “I was crushed…. I could not stand to seeing my daughter go through this again….” He texted Father Pfleger and said he had given up but shortly afterwards O’Neill said a sense of peace came over him.

 

Calling his daughter, Jessica, up to the podium, O’Neill picked her up kissing her. “God is awesome. Jessica has been in remission for one full year. Jessica is cancer-free….” “If God has done all of this for me, just imagine what he has in store for you. Being a father is not easy, but I would not give this job up for the world.” “I’m just father learning how to be a better son.

Later, Father Michael L. Pfleger asked for all fatherless children to come to the center aisle of the church. Besides praying for them on this very special day, he told them they are never to be alone for all the men at Saint Sabina are their fathers and the women their aunts, cousins….

 

When a family member of 17-year-old Ondelee Perteet pushed his wheelchair towards the aisle, Pfleger hugged the teen and again reminded him that despite what doctors say one day he will walk. Perteet was shot at a party in September of 2009 at the age of 14. He was paralyzed. He is a member of Saint Sabina and often speaks out against gun violence.

 

At the end of the service, Pfleger distributed wristbands to all of the fathers that had the word “TRUST” embossed on them. 

 Chinta Strausberg is a Journalist of more than 33-years, a former political reporter and a current PCC Network talk show host. You can e-mail Strausberg at: Chintabernie@aol.com.